A therapist at hey emma listening to a client share their concerns with experiencing mismatched libido. They work with a sex therapist in Cincinnati, OH at hey emma.

Mismatched Libido or Desire Discrepancy Therapy in Cincinnati, OH

Because couples often have different levels of desire.

Let us begin by saying very few couples have the same level of sexual desire. Knowing that may provide some comfort. But, it probably does not provide a solution to the arguments, isolation, shame, and hurt that has possibly entered your relationship due to desire discrepancy or mismatched libido. We know that this topic creates a lot of frustration and hurt for couples. But, we can help you walk through it. Together, we can find a resolution that both you and your partner are happy with. Before we discuss what we can do to help couples experiencing sexual desire discrepancy, let’s take a closer look at what desire itself means.

A therapist at hey emma listening to a client share their concerns with experiencing mismatched libido. They work with a sex therapist in Cincinnati, OH at hey emma.

Mismatched Libido or Desire Discrepancy Therapy in Cincinnati, OH

Because couples often have different levels of desire.

Let us begin by saying very few couples have the same level of sexual desire. Knowing that may provide some comfort. But, it probably does not provide a solution to the arguments, isolation, shame, and hurt that has possibly entered your relationship due to desire discrepancy or mismatched libido. We know that this topic creates a lot of frustration and hurt for couples. But, we can help you walk through it. Together, we can find a resolution that both you and your partner are happy with. Before we discuss what we can do to help couples experiencing sexual desire discrepancy, let’s take a closer look at what desire itself means.

What is Desire and how does it work?

Desire is experienced in different ways from person to person. To best understand how people experience desire, we need to discuss the difference between spontaneous desire, responsive desire, and context-dependent desire.

As we describe the difference in these three types of ways that people experience desire, you will likely identify which category you fall into rather fast. But, it is very important for you to know that all types of desire are normal and healthy. One is not better than the other. You and your partner may experience desire in different ways. But, this does not mean you’re destined to be unhappy.

Spontaneous Desire

This is the “common” narrative of sexual desire. It makes up for how 75% of men and 15% of women experience desire. This type of desire usually occurs in anticipation of pleasure. Or, it occurs in response to sexy stimuli (i.e. partner getting undressed; a stimulating thought)

Overcoming Mismatched Libido

Now that you know that there are different ways that people experience desire, let’s take a quick look at other factors that could be impacting desire. There are quite a few things that could be impacting your sexual desire and creating challenges in your sexual functioning.

A few things that might impact desire include…

When we begin counseling, we will be sure to assess all areas of your life to make sure we have a clear picture of what may be impacting your sexual desire.

Responsive Desire

This type of desire emerges in response to pleasure and occurs when people notice that they want sex after sexy things have already happened. It makes up for 5% of men and 30% of women. This can include things like the environment feeling warm, seductive, and arousing. Or, it can happen from a date night that led to an emotional connection between you and your partner.

What now?

Since you are now an expert on sexual desire, you may be wondering, what’s next?  Schedule an appointment with a therapist at Hey Emma and begin breaking down barriers and increasing communication surrounding your sexual desire.

As sex therapists, we can help you understand how you experience desire. Together, we can teach you how to communicate your needs with your partner. Desire discrepancy does not mean your relationship is at a dead end. In fact, learning about how you experience desire can be the beginning of an exciting road to sexual enjoyment and fulfillment.

Context Dependent Desire

This category of desire makes up the remainder of the population. Context-dependent means there are specific external circumstances and internal factors that need to be at play for the desire to occur. This may mean a to-do list needs to be complete and kids have to be at their grandparents. Or, it may mean the body is functioning well and stress levels are low.

Next Steps

Begin Working on your Mismatched Libido or Desire Discrepancy…

At Hey Emma we’re here to support you in your journey towards having a healthier sex life. We want you to feel informed and empowered to deal with the challenges you’re currently experiencing. We want to help you and your partner overcome the challenges associated with mismatched libido and desire discrepancy. We offer you a safe non-judgemental space to improve your sex life. To begin counseling in Cincinnati or online therapy in Ohio, or Kentucky, follow these steps:

Contact our Office

Contact Hey Emma to ask all your questions.

Schedule a Free Consult

Talk to a sex and relationship therapist to find the right fit.

Start Your Therapy

Begin counseling and work towards having a great intimate relationship(s).

Other Services offered at Hey Emma

More to check out…

The therapy team at Hey Emma specializes in offering sex therapy. But that’s not the only therapy service they provide at one of the offices or online across Ohio,and Kentucky. In addition to sex therapy, our therapists treat general mental health and relationship concerns. We treat many different sexual concerns including sexual pain and erectile dysfunction, and we offer anxiety treatment, depression treatment, trauma and PTSD treatment, EMDR, and relationship and couples therapy. We offer therapy in Cincinnati, OH, West Chester, OH, and Ft. Mitchell, KY. Contact our office to learn more about the many ways our team of skilled clinicians can help you thrive.