Therapist Holli providing Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) to a parent

Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Parents in Cincinnati, OH

Parents, Let’s Talk about Sex

Do you remember the moment when your five-year-old came and asked you where they came from? Or when they were nine and asked you what their body parts were used for? During early childhood, you might have felt comfortable with giving them an answer that didn’t necessarily paint the entire picture.

Now you find yourself faced with the fact that your children are approaching adolescence (quickly)! This can be terrifying, and you may want to avoid the conversation all together. The truth of the matter is that your kids are going to get their answers about sex one way or another. As terrifying or uncomfortable having this conversation may be for you, there are tools and help that can guide you!

Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Parents in Cincinnati, OH

Parents, Let’s Talk about Sex

Therapist Holli providing Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) to a parent

Do you remember the moment when your five-year-old came and asked you where they came from? Or when they were nine and asked you what their body parts were used for? During early childhood, you might have felt comfortable with giving them an answer that didn’t necessarily paint the entire picture.

Now you find yourself faced with the fact that your children are approaching adolescence (quickly)! This can be terrifying, and you may want to avoid the conversation all together. The truth of the matter is that your kids are going to get their answers about sex one way or another. As terrifying or uncomfortable having this conversation may be for you, there are tools and help that can guide you!

WHAT ARE TEENS ASKING ABOUT?

Common Questions your Teen May Ask:

You may feel like some of the questions your teen asks about sex are considered “normal.”

Maybe your teen comes to you with a question that you simply just do not know the answer to.

There may be a generational piece that plays into this. Maybe before the last five to ten years you weren’t aware that gender fluidity existed, or what the letters LGBTQ+ stood for. The list of questions below is just a snapshot of what you may be asked and are provided to normalize the experience of answering them as a parent.

  • What does puberty mean?
  • Why am I bleeding from my vagina?
  • What does sex mean?
  • Is it okay for me to be attracted to a boy, if I’m a boy?
  • When can I have sex?
  • Will I get pregnant if I have sex?
  • What is anal sex?
  • How do I know if I’m ready for sex?
  • What does rape mean?
  • Why don’t I feel attracted to anyone?
  • Is my penis normal?
  • Why was one of my friends called a slut?
  • How do I use a condom?
  • Can I get birth control?
  • Will I get an STI if I have sex?
  • What if I don’t want to have sex?
  • What is masturbation?

How Dialectical Behavior Can Help

It’s possible to feel better. Imagine a life where you could…

One of the core aspects of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is encouraging you and another to have a conversation! In this case it’s you and your teen, or maybe it’s you and your partner in how to talk with your teen about sex. In its essence, dialectical means a combination of opposites. In this case, as a parent you are recognizing that your teen is changing, and you are working towards accepting that.

There are five specific skill sets that are presented in DBT: Mindfulness, Emotion Regulation, Walking the Middle Path, Distress Tolerance, and Interpersonal Effectiveness. In having conversations regarding sex with your teen the three skill sets that will be most beneficial are: Mindfulness, Walking the Middle Path, and Interpersonal Effectiveness. This is not to say that the other two are not valuable!

Being mindful of where you are emotionally or even physically when your teen comes to you with these questions will be helpful! For example, say your daughter comes to you and asks how she can start birth control. You just closed your computer after a long day at work, you may be feeling tired or stressed. Recognizing that you may not be in the right state to have this discussion with your daughter is okay! Your ability to be mindful with where you are is going to help in having the conversations when you are focused on the moment at hand, not distracted by what else may be going on.

Keeping with the example above, it’s okay to say that you are not ready to have the conversation at that exact moment. Although, it is important that you make time and space to go back to have the conversation. This is part of the Walking the Middle Path skill set. By utilizing this skill set, in the moment you could say something along the lines of “I just finished work, can we have this conversation after dinner tonight?” The key is making sure that you do have the conversation. When you do follow through and having the conversation, you are building trust with your teen and validating their needs at the same time!

Interpersonal Effectiveness skills are about maintaining yourself respect, maintaining your relationship with others, and problem-solving. This is going to be huge when having conversations about sex with your teens. As a parent being aware of your values and how you view sex is important and at the same token recognizing that your teen may hold a different view or experience. This is where the dialect comes in! It’s okay for you to have different point of views and validating that is key.

DBT and conversations with your teen

DBT can help in utilizing skills to have conversations about sex with your teen. It’s okay to feel scared, hesitant, or even avoidance in having “the talk.” Although, your teen is coming to you because they feel comfortable in doing so, give yourself some validation for that in itself! Taking the perspective that you are both in this journey together is going to be helpful.

At Emma Schmidt and Associates our therapists are here to help you have better communication with your children so you can get back to enjoying relationships with those you love.

Our Approach to Dialectical Behavior Therapy

DBT consists of 45-50-minute, one-on-one sessions that help you work through your concerns. In addition to listening, we will ask questions and provide guidance based on our expertise. We play a very active role in the therapeutic process. Here’s how it will work step-by-step:

  1. We will provide a safe, accepting space so that you will feel comfortable sharing your struggles with us.
  2. We will listen to your story to try and determine the best course of action.
  3. We will address your immediate concerns like managing difficult conversations and challenging life situations.
  4. Together we will create some goals for therapy
  5. Keeping your unique goals in mind, we’ll figure out what’s needed to help you reach them
  6. Over the course of our sessions, you will start making progress towards the life you desire.

Research shows that DBT Counseling can positively change your thinking, beliefs, emotions, and behaviors. It can help you let go of what’s holding you back. Let us help you feel better.

Online Therapy for DBT in Ohio, Indiana, and Kentucky:

If you’re unable to make it to our Cincinnati-based counseling clinic, know that we also offer online therapy in Ohio ,online therapy in Indiana, and online therapy in Kentucky to help individuals deal better understand DBT and how to engage your child. Our therapists are skilled at providing high-quality online therapy and can offer you the same high-quality counseling services through our telehealth platform. If you’re not sure if online therapy is right for you, but think it might be, contact us. We offer free 15-minute consultations so you can connect with a therapist and see if you enjoy meeting with a therapist online.

Next Steps

Begin DPT…

If you’re ready to begin a conversation about Dialectical Behavior Therapy and work on the issues that matter most to you, Hey Emma would be honored to speak with you and share the many ways we can help you thrive. To begin counseling in Cincinnati, OH, or online therapy, follow these steps:

Contact our Office

Contact Hey Emma to ask all your questions.

Schedule a Free Consult

Talk to a DPT trained therapist to find the right fit.

Start Your Therapy

Begin DBT treatment and start something new.

Other Services offered at Hey Emma

More to check out…

The therapy team at Hey Emma specializes in offering sex therapy. But that’s not the only therapy service they provide at one of the offices or online across Ohio, Kentucky, and Indiana. In addition to sex therapy, our therapists treat general mental health and relationship concerns. We treat many different sexual concerns including sexual pain and erectile dysfunction, and we offer anxiety treatment, depression treatment, trauma and PTSD treatment, EMDR, and relationship and couples therapy. We offer therapy in Cincinnati, OH, West Chester, OH, Ft. Mitchell, KY, and Indianapolis, IN. Contact our office to learn more about the many ways our team of skilled clinicians can help you thrive.