It’s no secret that The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman has impacted the ways we talk about love in our relationships and in counseling. His work has given us the words to express the often difficult topic of how we prefer to show and be shown love. If you and your partner haven’t explored what your love languages are, I highly recommend completing the short questionnaire on his website,, and sharing your answers with each other. You may learn something about yourself and your partner!

The following date night ideas are based on the 5 love languages. Feel free to add to the list or make an idea your own! Many partners have different love languages from each other, so it may be helpful to combine two date ideas. If you’re looking for a way to revive your love life, you can use these ideas to build a date night that helps you and your partner feel connected and cherished.

Words of Affirmation

A date that centers on Words of Affirmation may be a great time to renew or verbalize your commitment to each other! This doesn’t have to be fancy. It can be as simple as writing your loved one a letter about their qualities that you love and appreciate. Exchange your letters during dinner or another time away from distractions. If your words come from the heart, you can’t go wrong!

Quality Time

Date night doesn’t have to mean dinner and a movie. In fact, I’d recommend staying far away from anything to do with movies or TV while on a Quality Time date. Many couples have shows that they like to watch together, my partner and me included, but often this isn’t “quality” time. Instead, pick an activity where you actually have to interact with each other. Have dinner together, play a game, or just take a drive. Google “date night questions” and see what you can learn about each other. This date doesn’t have to be anything wild or expensive. It’s enough if you show up and are interested in your partner, without other distractions.

Receiving Gifts

There was a recent TikTok “Target Challenge” that challenged a couple to go to Target with a budget and list of items to buy for their partner. The list can include items like “favorite snack” or “something that reminds me of you”. Then, the couple comes back together to give each other the items. I honestly love this idea for a Receiving Gifts date night! Set a budget, create a list, go to a store of your choice (or do online shopping and curbside pickup!), and have a fun date night seeing what your partner picked out for you. Just remember- this isn’t a competition! The goal isn’t about how much money you spend or picking out the “right” stuff… it’s enough that you’ve taken the time to think about what your partner likes!

Acts of Service

A fun date idea for an Acts of Service date could be spending time helping your community together. This could be anything from walking dogs at a local dog shelter to serving food at a food shelter. However, in this pandemic, this might not be available as an option. So, for a date night at home idea, try cooking a meal together! Even if one partner is the “chef”, the other partner can help by setting the table or cleaning up the mess. You’ll both feel accomplished and connected as you create a delicious meal together.

Physical Touch

Physical touch has such a broad meaning, and can be a source of discomfort, so I broke down this date night into mild, medium, and spicy. Pick whichever you’re most comfortable with, or see if you can challenge yourself to make things a little hotter than normal!

Mild: Pick a movie and get snuggly! Wear your comfy clothes, cuddle your partner, and just enjoy time holding each other.

Medium: Break out the massage lotion and give each other massages.

Spicy: Try a date night in bed. Dress (or undress!) to your comfort and enjoy each other’s bodies in whatever way makes you feel good.

When it comes to date night, especially during a pandemic, it really is the thought that counts. Setting aside intentional time to connect with your partner is one of the best things you can do for your relationship. This time might ideally look different for both you and your partner, and that’s fine! Any time you have together, where you are intentionally cherishing the other, is a good date!